9 TikTokers Who Are Revolutionizing Sex Education Online

By day, 19-year-old Maxx Fenning is a business student at the University of Florida. But by night, he takes on the role of professor, where he teaches a course called “School for Sluts” on TikTok and Discord. Thousands flock to his virtual livestream classes, where he can be found scribbling on a whiteboard about topics ranging from consent and STIs to bottoming and douching. The first few minutes can be quiet as viewers get comfortable, but by the end of his hour-long classes, questions and comments flood the discussion section. For many of Fenning’s 44,000 followers, it’s no doubt one of the only spaces where they can feel comfortable learning about their sexuality.

It was Fenning’s own lack of knowledge surrounding queer sex that inspired him to tackle sex ed. While he says that the sex ed classes at his own high school were relatively progressive and inclusive, there were still a number of blindspots when it came to non-heternormative sex. And he knows that he was lucky to have them in the first place, given the paltry state of sex ed for millions of other students nationwide.

“In high school, I didn't know what things like PrEP were, I didn't know the difference between HIV and AIDS,” Fenning says. “And so seeing that void of information – once I discovered just how much I didn't know — really motivated me to not only educate myself, but then turn that into educating other people.”

With ongoing efforts in school districts across the country to minimize sex ed curriculums, his work is more important than ever. Fenning recently added a class devoted entirely to Florida’s “Don’t Say Gay” bill, legislation recently signed into law that restricts classrooms from teaching about sexual orientation and gender identity through third grade in the state. And he’s now mobilizing his following to fight back against political injustices, often through his own non-profit, PRISM, which organizes events, fundraisers, and protests to help make education for LGBTQ+ communities more accessible.

Fenning is just one of dozens of TikTokers using their platform to teach about queer sex and activism. Popular accounts like @thatgaydoctor and @doctorcarlton are run by seasoned MDs who use their medical background to talk about developments in HIV gene therapy and how to conduct STI tests from home. Others, such as @hotcheetopants (who also posts to @queer101irv) and “Transman Nyko” (@kingnyko2022), open up about their journey towards accepting their sexual and gender identities.

Accounts like these can be a lifeline, especially if you’re queer. According to the 2019 GLSEN School Climate survey, over 24% of LGBTQ+ students have never received any school-based sex education, and only 8% of those who have said it was inclusive of LGBTQ+ topics. And with TikTok’s overwhelmingly young user base, high school and college-aged students who use the app to find memes and cute videos have found themselves stumbling across a kind of inclusive, diverse sex ed they never received in school, from the comfort and privacy of their phones.

Fenning says some of his followers are under the age of 18, many of whom haven’t told their parents about their TikToks, let alone come out to them as gay. “This is their space, they’re completely closeted to everyone outside of my page,” Fenning says. “It’s really a family that we’ve started building.”

He mentions one of the most pervasive comments on TikTok, one that anyone with an account has probably seen before: “TikTok taught me more than high school.”

It’s a cliché, he says, but only because it rings true for so many users: “In many ways, you really can learn more on TikTok than you ever could in school,” Fenning says.

Below, check out more TikTokers helping to revolutionize sex education on the platform.

Transman Nyko (@kingnyko2022)

Nyko clearly takes pride in being an open book on his TikTok, where it seems like no question is too vulnerable, intimate, or personal for him to answer. Although he only launched his page in January, he’s already garnered a loyal following of nearly 6,000 followers, with whom Nyko shares stories about his gender transition. In most of his videos, he fields questions from users, from the ultra-technical (which boxers are best for phalloplasty and how he grows a beard with testosterone injections) to the very personal (how his transition has affected his mental health).

Doctor Carlton (@doctorcarlton)

Boasting nearly 250,000 followers, Doctor Carlton (the self-proclaimed “CEO of Backdoor Stuff”) uses his medical background to teach his followers about medications like Post-Exposure Prophylaxis (or PEP), which can be used to cut the risk of HIV infection within 72 hours, and highlights resources for PrEP and STI testing. One recurring message on his platform is to “get checked where you play,” noting that many doctors aren’t properly trained in checking for infections and diseases that arise more often from gay sex, like anal cancer, or STIs that can go undetected if the rectum or throat aren’t tested. “Medicine can be homophobic sometimes,” he warns in one of his videos. “You have to look out for yourself.”

Katie Haan (@itskatiehaan)

Haan, who helps to decontrust heteronormative notions of sex on her page, likes to call herself TikTok’s Gay Big Sis, and her feed is chock full of lessons that are often missing from the traditional sex ed classroom. Most of her videos focus on sex, dating, and relationships within the queer community, which often come with her own critiques, such as the unhealthy ways consent and intimacy is represented in media. But she also doesn’t shy away from research-heavy segments: her “15 Sec. Facts” series includes explainers on the differences between untransmittable versus undetectable STIs and the mounting evidence that suggests that penis owners also have a hormonal cycle. The success of her TikTok led to her own podcast, Your Big Gay Sis, where she talks about everything from the ethics of porn to college hookup culture.

Lydia Collins (@lacollins_)

Lydia Collins is a writer and sexual health educator whose work focuses on HIV prevention in African, Caribbean, and Black communities. Her academic background makes her TikTok a great resource for those looking for reliable information about topics like STI transmission and birth control. One video features her top tips for using dental dams (only use one side, and always pair with a silicone or water-based lube), while others focus on boundary-setting in relationships, common myths surrounding PrEP, and advocating for oneself when interacting with doctors.

Sy Bernabei (@thegenderrebel)

44 year-old Sy Bernabei’s account is especially notable because of their 20 year career in LGBTQ+ advocacy. Currently an Executive Director for the non-profit Gender Justice in Nevada, they have also worked with the AIDS Project in Los Angeles, Aid for AIDS in Nevada, and the LGBT Center of Southern Nevada. They use their degree in secondary education to create lighthearted videos for their 95,000 followers that often focus on queer history, such as the largest trans trights demonstration in history and the origins and meaning of the non-binary flag. In other videos they delve deeper into more contemporary discourse, including definitions for newly popularized terms such as “TERF” and “gender critical” and red flags to look out for in queer dating.

Thatgaydoctor (@thatgaydoctor)

If you’ve curated a queer algorithm on TikTok, it’s likely that @thatgaydoctor, whose account boasts more than 700,000 followers, has shown up on your For You Page. The Chicago-based doctor, who prefers to go by his username for privacy, sends out daily dispatches from his “judgment-free” examination room, where he breaks down some of the most important advice he offers to his IRL patients: to be as specific as possible when requesting STI tests, since routine testing will look different for every person, and to come into every appointment prepared with the list of issues you hope to discuss, a practice he calls “agenda setting.” The topics he covers run the gamut, but he’s become known for his mental health-focused approach to healthcare, guiding his followers through issues such as sexual trauma and anxiety.

Alexis (@hotcheetopants)

In Alexis’s TikTok series “Ace Ed,” you’ll find digestible explainers on the wide-ranging spectrum of sexuality, a project that began with videos where she walks followers through her own journey towards figuring out her asexuality. The series now includes explainers on dozens of micro-labels that can help people figure out how they identify. Whether you’re a fictosexual or a demi-romantic, you’re sure to glean some affirming insight to your own behaviors while on her page. “Every single human can exist somewhere on the spectrum,” she says at the start of the series.

Charlie Straplin (@femmepretender)

One of Straplin’s most popular series is an explainer on sex harnesses. From pelvic and thigh, to feet and heel harnesses, she breaks down her favorite ways to use the popular accessory in bed as a way to have more mobile, comfortable and overall exciting sex. In one video, she opines on the benefits of thigh over pelvic harnesses, explaining that they tend to be more size inclusive and accessible for those with mobility issues. In another, she guides viewers through the ways that disabled people can take advantage of hand harnesses, which can be a gamechanger in bed for those who struggle moving their hips or hands.

Max Fenning (@maxxfenning)

Fenning’s “School for Sluts” courses, which he hosts as live streams on his Discord every Monday and Wednesday at 10 p.m. ET, include QS 101: Intro to Gender and Sexuality for Cis-Het Men, QS 1969: Intro to LGBTQ+ History for Gays Who Have Mommy and Daddy Issues, and most recently, AC 2022: Activism for Bottoms. Every week, his followers vote on which class they want to take that day through a poll, and they also get a say in which specific topics they’ll explore. The class titles, which follow the same format as those listed by real universities, are as playful as Fenning’s meme-able videos, where he can be found writing notes on a whiteboard or holding up an electric toothbrush as he demonstrates the best way to apply a condom. But Fenning also fuses humor with thoughtful research as he delves into more serious topics, like the history of the AIDS crisis and the potentially harmful effects of douching. Fenning also makes sure to link out his sources after every lesson, noting how important it is to remain a trustworthy source in the sea of disinformation that exists online.

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