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Untamed
Goodreads Choice Award
Nominee for Best Memoir & Autobiography (2020)Soulful and uproarious, forceful and tender, Untamed is both an intimate memoir and a galvanizing wake-up call. It is the story of how one woman learned that a responsible mother is not one who slowly dies for her children, but one who shows them how to fully live. It is the story of navigating divorce, forming a new blended family, and discovering that the brokenness or wholeness of a family depends not on its structure but on each member’s ability to bring her full self to the table. And it is the story of how each of us can begin to trust ourselves enough to set boundaries, make peace with our bodies, honor our anger and heartbreak, and unleash our truest, wildest instincts so that we become women who can finally look at ourselves and say: There She Is.
333 pages, Hardcover
First published March 10, 2020
About the author
Glennon Doyle
12 books8,972 followersAuthor, Activist, Founder of Together Rising, and Host of the We Can Do Hard Things Podcast.
Glennon Doyle is the author of the #1 New York Times bestsellers UNTAMED (a Reese’s Book Club selection) and LOVE WARRIOR ( an Oprah's Book Club selection), as well as the New York Times bestseller CARRY ON, WARRIOR. An activist and “patron saint of female empowerment” (People), Glennon is the founder and president of Together Rising, an all-women-led nonprofit organization that has revolutionized grassroots philanthropy – raising over $35 million for women, families, and children in crisis. She lives in California with her wife and three children.
Follow Glennon on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, and sign up for her email updates here: http://eepurl.com/OiRan.
Glennon Doyle is the author of the #1 New York Times bestsellers UNTAMED (a Reese’s Book Club selection) and LOVE WARRIOR ( an Oprah's Book Club selection), as well as the New York Times bestseller CARRY ON, WARRIOR. An activist and “patron saint of female empowerment” (People), Glennon is the founder and president of Together Rising, an all-women-led nonprofit organization that has revolutionized grassroots philanthropy – raising over $35 million for women, families, and children in crisis. She lives in California with her wife and three children.
Follow Glennon on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram, and sign up for her email updates here: http://eepurl.com/OiRan.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 33,833 reviews
April 8, 2020
Audiobook... read by Glennon Doyle
My thoughts and feelings changed ‘several’ times - from positive to negative - back to positive- back to negative!!!
By the end.... I was just glad to be DONE!
If this book was ‘clearly’ a memoir... I wouldn’t have felt annoyed.
I often didn’t buy her strategies in achieving emotional balance—-because ‘she’ lacked balance in important areas of life: true empathy for others.
Glennon will ALWAYS put her needs and desires ‘before’ others. She demonstrated several times how she swung that pendulum from being a person who didn’t know how to please herself to no longer pleasing anyone.
Glennon’s selfish tone towards others was brutal - rather than unflinching honest. She was down right mean, righteous at times.
I began to wonder if Glennon had respect for ‘anyone’ other than herself. Does she realize that many women know who they are? We don’t all judge our value ourselves by the size of thighs?
‘Part’ of being a whole contributing human being is sometimes putting other people’s needs first ( at cause), before our own.
Glennon is not there yet....
she still needs to ‘prove’ that she’s her own woman goddamnit!! Power to Glennon!
This review would make ZERO DIFFERENCE to Glennon.
She said herself, she doesn’t give a rats ass about my opinion - or what I think of her, anyway.
So how do people contribute ‘back’ to her? Where is her opening to ‘hearing’ that there might be a reason some of us readers ‘might’ (the Glennon sin?), feel she has a few things to still learn about the balance between being who we are - without verbally purging righteousness onto others.
Glennon clearly’ states she only cares about herself - over and over and over again.
Yes... this is a happy world with Glennon’s savvy wisdom.
She transferred one disorder… (over-eating, purging, over drinking, trouble with the law,), to a self serving shaming-others for not being like ‘her’.
PARTS WERE GOOD - in the beginning - until she chewed the human race to threads!
Her self righteous me me me - ME FIRST - no-pleasing others rule became annoying. I lost total respect!!!
I appreciated a few chapters in this book...
I liked her ‘own’ discovery about parenting - and where she went south in giving her son the message that his life (studying for school, tests the next day, etc.), were more important than his responsibility as a contributing member to the family.
After Glendon’s realization- that she was raising a self- centered - self serving kid- she made corrections.
She began to demand his respect and contributions to the family.
Now her kid did the dishes after dinner -(she made the meal after all).
Glennon’s ‘a-ha’ moments of parenting ‘discoveries’ ....
that raising a privileged son wasn’t doing him any long term service, was admirable.
I had much respect for Glennon’s ‘moral’ discovery—
I wished I had made that discovery myself when I was raising our daughters, myself.
I ‘allowed’ our daughters to do their homework ( skip dishes) because why? because their life wellness out in ‘their’ world was more important than them ‘contributing’ to ‘our’ family.
I did the fricken dishes -
I made the meals -
I did the cleaning -
Paul supported our family financially.
Hell - I made their lunches - drove them to their many activities every single day - ( private independent schools, music lessons, sports, dance, theater, Hebrew school, etc) I was their slave and I was wrong!!! I never taught them to sincerely value and respect Paul and I.
Guess what? Both daughters are successful in the world and independent - but only one of them respects Paul and I fully and expresses it.
So... I felt that Glendon did have some very valuable insights into the role of parenting.
But...
I never got the impression that she respected her own
parents.
She patted herself on the back about how great she was.
So... I thought Glennon shared some useful tips about parenting from morality rather than kids accomplishments in the outside world.
However, every time Glennon moved away from ‘sharing’ her experiences -
and started preaching her views -
I lost total respect for her.
Glennon is ‘not’ a talented compassionate INSPIRATIONAL or SPIRITUAL leader...
Her lack of empathy and appropriate speaking skills fell apart.
I spent a couple of days trying to figure out what it was that she did that DROVE ME NUTS....
She was self serving and annoying in her ME FIRST Philosophy.
Too much swinging-that pendulum with her good girl/ bad girl themes.
...Glennon is a recovered alcoholic-
...A recovered bulimic-
...A girl who had destroyed all her relationships at one time as well.
I’m happy Glennon found her own voice - and did some repair work - learned to look inward at her own needs and desires - rather than self harm herself.
BUT...
I was incredibly embarrassed by many things she said - and the tone in which she said them. Even her words about being a feminist were cringe-shaking off the wall.
RIGHTEOUS is as RIGHTEOUS is!!! ( yuck)
It was her ASSUMPTION that most woman were just like
her -
Only focusing on makeup-clothes- getting others to love ‘us’...
Glennon Doyle crossed the line into PUSHING HER RIGHTEOUSNESS on others.
One minute she talked about nurturing relationships and the next minute she slammed any person who called her on the telephone or sent her a text message for the gall of interrupting her life.
My God then she compared the last presidential race to the apocalypse. What the hell?
I think this is the last book I ever plan to read by Glennon Doyle.
She’s not Eckhart Tolle, Brené Brown, Lama Surya Das, or Don Miguel Ruiz....
This is a MEMOIR — that bordered closely to PREACHING!
Glennon Doyle is a woman who took many years to find her own voice.... years of healing from self harm - harming others as well.
She still has a few loose marbles about the totality of humanity.....
I don’t want to live inside her ‘ME FIRST’ bubble.
There are many shades of gray. Life is not all black or white - as Glennon would have us to believe.
She was down right mean to people who asked her questions.
Glennon Doyle is not a person I trust to teach me HOW TO BE A POWERFUL WOMEN!
2.5 stars - rating down.
My thoughts and feelings changed ‘several’ times - from positive to negative - back to positive- back to negative!!!
By the end.... I was just glad to be DONE!
If this book was ‘clearly’ a memoir... I wouldn’t have felt annoyed.
I often didn’t buy her strategies in achieving emotional balance—-because ‘she’ lacked balance in important areas of life: true empathy for others.
Glennon will ALWAYS put her needs and desires ‘before’ others. She demonstrated several times how she swung that pendulum from being a person who didn’t know how to please herself to no longer pleasing anyone.
Glennon’s selfish tone towards others was brutal - rather than unflinching honest. She was down right mean, righteous at times.
I began to wonder if Glennon had respect for ‘anyone’ other than herself. Does she realize that many women know who they are? We don’t all judge our value ourselves by the size of thighs?
‘Part’ of being a whole contributing human being is sometimes putting other people’s needs first ( at cause), before our own.
Glennon is not there yet....
she still needs to ‘prove’ that she’s her own woman goddamnit!! Power to Glennon!
This review would make ZERO DIFFERENCE to Glennon.
She said herself, she doesn’t give a rats ass about my opinion - or what I think of her, anyway.
So how do people contribute ‘back’ to her? Where is her opening to ‘hearing’ that there might be a reason some of us readers ‘might’ (the Glennon sin?), feel she has a few things to still learn about the balance between being who we are - without verbally purging righteousness onto others.
Glennon clearly’ states she only cares about herself - over and over and over again.
Yes... this is a happy world with Glennon’s savvy wisdom.
She transferred one disorder… (over-eating, purging, over drinking, trouble with the law,), to a self serving shaming-others for not being like ‘her’.
PARTS WERE GOOD - in the beginning - until she chewed the human race to threads!
Her self righteous me me me - ME FIRST - no-pleasing others rule became annoying. I lost total respect!!!
I appreciated a few chapters in this book...
I liked her ‘own’ discovery about parenting - and where she went south in giving her son the message that his life (studying for school, tests the next day, etc.), were more important than his responsibility as a contributing member to the family.
After Glendon’s realization- that she was raising a self- centered - self serving kid- she made corrections.
She began to demand his respect and contributions to the family.
Now her kid did the dishes after dinner -(she made the meal after all).
Glennon’s ‘a-ha’ moments of parenting ‘discoveries’ ....
that raising a privileged son wasn’t doing him any long term service, was admirable.
I had much respect for Glennon’s ‘moral’ discovery—
I wished I had made that discovery myself when I was raising our daughters, myself.
I ‘allowed’ our daughters to do their homework ( skip dishes) because why? because their life wellness out in ‘their’ world was more important than them ‘contributing’ to ‘our’ family.
I did the fricken dishes -
I made the meals -
I did the cleaning -
Paul supported our family financially.
Hell - I made their lunches - drove them to their many activities every single day - ( private independent schools, music lessons, sports, dance, theater, Hebrew school, etc) I was their slave and I was wrong!!! I never taught them to sincerely value and respect Paul and I.
Guess what? Both daughters are successful in the world and independent - but only one of them respects Paul and I fully and expresses it.
So... I felt that Glendon did have some very valuable insights into the role of parenting.
But...
I never got the impression that she respected her own
parents.
She patted herself on the back about how great she was.
So... I thought Glennon shared some useful tips about parenting from morality rather than kids accomplishments in the outside world.
However, every time Glennon moved away from ‘sharing’ her experiences -
and started preaching her views -
I lost total respect for her.
Glennon is ‘not’ a talented compassionate INSPIRATIONAL or SPIRITUAL leader...
Her lack of empathy and appropriate speaking skills fell apart.
I spent a couple of days trying to figure out what it was that she did that DROVE ME NUTS....
She was self serving and annoying in her ME FIRST Philosophy.
Too much swinging-that pendulum with her good girl/ bad girl themes.
...Glennon is a recovered alcoholic-
...A recovered bulimic-
...A girl who had destroyed all her relationships at one time as well.
I’m happy Glennon found her own voice - and did some repair work - learned to look inward at her own needs and desires - rather than self harm herself.
BUT...
I was incredibly embarrassed by many things she said - and the tone in which she said them. Even her words about being a feminist were cringe-shaking off the wall.
RIGHTEOUS is as RIGHTEOUS is!!! ( yuck)
It was her ASSUMPTION that most woman were just like
her -
Only focusing on makeup-clothes- getting others to love ‘us’...
Glennon Doyle crossed the line into PUSHING HER RIGHTEOUSNESS on others.
One minute she talked about nurturing relationships and the next minute she slammed any person who called her on the telephone or sent her a text message for the gall of interrupting her life.
My God then she compared the last presidential race to the apocalypse. What the hell?
I think this is the last book I ever plan to read by Glennon Doyle.
She’s not Eckhart Tolle, Brené Brown, Lama Surya Das, or Don Miguel Ruiz....
This is a MEMOIR — that bordered closely to PREACHING!
Glennon Doyle is a woman who took many years to find her own voice.... years of healing from self harm - harming others as well.
She still has a few loose marbles about the totality of humanity.....
I don’t want to live inside her ‘ME FIRST’ bubble.
There are many shades of gray. Life is not all black or white - as Glennon would have us to believe.
She was down right mean to people who asked her questions.
Glennon Doyle is not a person I trust to teach me HOW TO BE A POWERFUL WOMEN!
2.5 stars - rating down.
December 27, 2020
Elitist Drivel
For those looking for an old schoolrant review, today is your lucky day.
I have so many thoughts and words floating through my head right now that I am struggling to formulate a review - which almost never happens.
In fact, speaking of "struggle..."
This book was a struggle to get through. And I have a feeling it matches the struggle of being Glennon Doyle and living inside Glennon's Doyle's head - ALL of which is created and meticulously curated by Glennon Doyle.
Seriously though, she is the driver of her own self-mechanized Struggle Bus, yet acts like she has overcome monumental life suffering derived from forces outside her own damn self.
But I will come back to that.
First, I want to say (before I forget to do so) that I was really looking forward to reading this. The blurb sounded awesome. A former Christian mommy-blogger who reinvents herself upon meeting and falling in love with a woman? Sign me up.
Key word there, though: INVENTS. Because hardly anything about this book felt authentic.
In fact, this book felt like nothing more than an elitist American white woman (who has never truly suffered from anything more than low self-esteem) attempting to prove how "woke" she is because, hey, she's a lesbian now, yo, and just rocking life so much better than you.
For the first 50 pages, she had me totally on board and I was enjoying her story and her message.
But then the completely self-righteous (and yet wholly indeterminate) lecturing about every buzz-word topic on the planet started. Motherhood? Racism? Feminism? Toxic masculinity? The dangers of technology and its effects on mindfulness?
Step aside, peons, because Glennon Doyle has this shit ALL figured out. And she will tell you all about it. Because she gets it more than you.
The fact that she - a grown ass middle/upper class married American woman with three children - didn't even know how to buy her own plane ticket? Irrelevant. She still adults SO much better than you. Because she trusts her "knowing." And because I do what I want, losers.
And don't get even get me started on how much she contradicts herself and makes her complete hypocrisy blatantly obvious whilst still lecturing us all on how we should be doing things.
In one chapter, she talks about how she was a "good parent" to her first daughter, but then "got tired....[and] by the time [her third child] exited the birth canal, [she] just handed her an iPad and wished the child godspeed on her journey."
She talks about how this made her third child SO #independent and confident in who she is...and then turns around and talks about how she decided to take her son's cell phone away because it was stifling his "creativity" and causing him to withdraw from life. She, of course, includes the whole conversation she later had with her son (her firstborn) about taking away said cell phone...a conversation in which she, of course, sounds like a mage-mother with woke mom skills. Because, you know, #stillbetterthanyou.
And while on the topic of phones...she later discusses how her friend Erika called her cell phone. Poor Erika.
Wow.
I have no words. That quote basically encompasses so much about this woman. She is so sensitive, she is "damaged" by her friend calling her, you know, to be a FRIEND. And she prefers texts, but doesn't answer them, because (again) I do what I want and refuse to be a part of your damned patriarchy. But here is your iPad, sweetie.
She is also so damned sensitive and "empathetic" that she RECENTLY became so tired, hungry, and concerned while watching Survivorman on TV that her wife had to remind her that, don't worry, he would be okay. Because TELEVISION. And PRODUCTION TEAM.
And I am supposed to give a fuck what this woman thinks about real world issues?
Nope.
I would continue to include more contradictory quotes and stories - of which there are MANY. But I just can't be bothered to think or talk about this woman and her book one second longer. In fact, the minute I finish this review, both this book and my thoughts about it are headed for the bin.
Because I can do what I want too.
For those looking for an old school
I have so many thoughts and words floating through my head right now that I am struggling to formulate a review - which almost never happens.
In fact, speaking of "struggle..."
This book was a struggle to get through. And I have a feeling it matches the struggle of being Glennon Doyle and living inside Glennon's Doyle's head - ALL of which is created and meticulously curated by Glennon Doyle.
Seriously though, she is the driver of her own self-mechanized Struggle Bus, yet acts like she has overcome monumental life suffering derived from forces outside her own damn self.
But I will come back to that.
First, I want to say (before I forget to do so) that I was really looking forward to reading this. The blurb sounded awesome. A former Christian mommy-blogger who reinvents herself upon meeting and falling in love with a woman? Sign me up.
Key word there, though: INVENTS. Because hardly anything about this book felt authentic.
In fact, this book felt like nothing more than an elitist American white woman (who has never truly suffered from anything more than low self-esteem) attempting to prove how "woke" she is because, hey, she's a lesbian now, yo, and just rocking life so much better than you.
For the first 50 pages, she had me totally on board and I was enjoying her story and her message.
But then the completely self-righteous (and yet wholly indeterminate) lecturing about every buzz-word topic on the planet started. Motherhood? Racism? Feminism? Toxic masculinity? The dangers of technology and its effects on mindfulness?
Step aside, peons, because Glennon Doyle has this shit ALL figured out. And she will tell you all about it. Because she gets it more than you.
The fact that she - a grown ass middle/upper class married American woman with three children - didn't even know how to buy her own plane ticket? Irrelevant. She still adults SO much better than you. Because she trusts her "knowing." And because I do what I want, losers.
And don't get even get me started on how much she contradicts herself and makes her complete hypocrisy blatantly obvious whilst still lecturing us all on how we should be doing things.
In one chapter, she talks about how she was a "good parent" to her first daughter, but then "got tired....[and] by the time [her third child] exited the birth canal, [she] just handed her an iPad and wished the child godspeed on her journey."
She talks about how this made her third child SO #independent and confident in who she is...and then turns around and talks about how she decided to take her son's cell phone away because it was stifling his "creativity" and causing him to withdraw from life. She, of course, includes the whole conversation she later had with her son (her firstborn) about taking away said cell phone...a conversation in which she, of course, sounds like a mage-mother with woke mom skills. Because, you know, #stillbetterthanyou.
And while on the topic of phones...she later discusses how her friend Erika called her cell phone. Poor Erika.
"Recently, my friend Erika called my cell phone. I will never understand why people insist upon calling my cell phone. It's such an aggressive action to take: calling someone. Each time my phone rings, I have a heart attack like my pocket's on fire and a tiny siren is going off."
Wow.
I have no words. That quote basically encompasses so much about this woman. She is so sensitive, she is "damaged" by her friend calling her, you know, to be a FRIEND. And she prefers texts, but doesn't answer them, because (again) I do what I want and refuse to be a part of your damned patriarchy. But here is your iPad, sweetie.
She is also so damned sensitive and "empathetic" that she RECENTLY became so tired, hungry, and concerned while watching Survivorman on TV that her wife had to remind her that, don't worry, he would be okay. Because TELEVISION. And PRODUCTION TEAM.
And I am supposed to give a fuck what this woman thinks about real world issues?
Nope.
I would continue to include more contradictory quotes and stories - of which there are MANY. But I just can't be bothered to think or talk about this woman and her book one second longer. In fact, the minute I finish this review, both this book and my thoughts about it are headed for the bin.
Because I can do what I want too.
December 30, 2021
I totally get why people would find this book cheesy but as someone who also realized she’s queer pretty late in life, I really enjoyed reading about her revelations and decision to prioritize her feelings and self-actualization. So maybe I just read this at the right time :)
These quotes particularly resonated with me:
"I did not know, before that woman told me, that all feelings were for feeling. I did not know that I was supposed to feel everything. I thought I was supposed to feel happy. I thought that happy was for feeling and that pain was for fixing and numbing and deflecting and hiding and ignoring. I thought that when life got hard, it was because I had gone wrong somewhere. I thought that pain was weakness and that I was supposed to suck it up. But the thing was that the more I sucked it up, the more food and booze I had to suck down."
"First: I can feel everything and survive. What I thought would kill me, didn't. Every time I said to myself: I can't take this anymore--I was wrong. The truth was that I could and did take it all--and I kept surviving. Surviving again and again made me less afraid of myself, of other people of life. I learned that I'd never be free from pain but I could be free from the fear of pain, and that was enough. I finally stopped avoiding fires long enough to let myself burn, and what I learned was that I am like that burning bush: The fire of pain won't consume me. I can burn and burn alive. I can live on fire. I am fireproof. Second: I can use pain to become."
Why I’m not rating this book 5 stars is because I didn’t feel as engaged in the second half. While I really loved the way she opened up in the first half about her experience falling in love with a woman and realizing she’s queer, the second half lacked a narrative thread and fell into a pattern of anecdotes with philosophical notions. I admire how self-reflective and spiritual she is (I wish I had more of those qualities!) but the book starts to border on preachiness where she talks like she’s giving a sermon. And there was one random chapter where she talked about unlearning racism and I was just like… ok good for you I guess? This is definitely the kind of book that I can see white feminists and religious liberals eating up, I’m just not quite in that demographic haha.
These quotes particularly resonated with me:
"I did not know, before that woman told me, that all feelings were for feeling. I did not know that I was supposed to feel everything. I thought I was supposed to feel happy. I thought that happy was for feeling and that pain was for fixing and numbing and deflecting and hiding and ignoring. I thought that when life got hard, it was because I had gone wrong somewhere. I thought that pain was weakness and that I was supposed to suck it up. But the thing was that the more I sucked it up, the more food and booze I had to suck down."
"First: I can feel everything and survive. What I thought would kill me, didn't. Every time I said to myself: I can't take this anymore--I was wrong. The truth was that I could and did take it all--and I kept surviving. Surviving again and again made me less afraid of myself, of other people of life. I learned that I'd never be free from pain but I could be free from the fear of pain, and that was enough. I finally stopped avoiding fires long enough to let myself burn, and what I learned was that I am like that burning bush: The fire of pain won't consume me. I can burn and burn alive. I can live on fire. I am fireproof. Second: I can use pain to become."
Why I’m not rating this book 5 stars is because I didn’t feel as engaged in the second half. While I really loved the way she opened up in the first half about her experience falling in love with a woman and realizing she’s queer, the second half lacked a narrative thread and fell into a pattern of anecdotes with philosophical notions. I admire how self-reflective and spiritual she is (I wish I had more of those qualities!) but the book starts to border on preachiness where she talks like she’s giving a sermon. And there was one random chapter where she talked about unlearning racism and I was just like… ok good for you I guess? This is definitely the kind of book that I can see white feminists and religious liberals eating up, I’m just not quite in that demographic haha.
March 21, 2020
According to my kindle, I made it 71% of the way through this book before I called the time of death. The themes of honoring yourself, busting societal boundaries, and fighting inequality were appealing and honorable. But they didn’t feel honest. Glennon uses direct quotes to express exchanges that happened years prior. The quotes are too perfect. It’s the phrasing we’d use if we had years to reframe conversations and an editor to clean up the narrative. She’s lead a remarkable life. I’m sure the polishing was intended for the ease of the reader, but it created a disconnect I couldn’t see past.
March 13, 2020
I wanted to like this book and I am sure for most this book is inspirational and empowering. I agree with her core message, I just found the whole book annoying. I can’t put my finger on it.
April 20, 2020
I wish I could UNREAD this.
April 4, 2020
Bland White feminism, paired with self-fan fiction.
November 10, 2020
I'm not the target audience for this book, but I am glad she found her path and a loving partner.
April 2, 2022
Did you hear choo choo sound of disappointment train! Yes, I heard it, I’ve been there, done that! And can you feel the approaching steps of “unpopular review”: yes, it’s coming right now…One step, two step, three step: And here we are: I’m about to give two stars one of the books inspired and got so many great reviews from the readers. I wish I could be one of them. I wish I could carry a happy smile after reading this memoir and clap my hands to show my devotion and respect to the author. Nope, it’s not gonna happen!
Firstly: I felt like I turned myself into a Foucault Pendulum because my feelings kept swinging between love and hate. I didn’t have so many negative and positive reactions to a book at the same time. But unfortunately negativity defeated the power of positive thoughts.
The beginning of the book was so promising: Glennon is strong woman: recovered alcoholic, bulimic, humanitarian, activist, wife and mother of three falls in love. At the first time in her life she knows the other person is the one: somebody truly stole her heart and finding your soulmate is just a start for her self-discovery and the beginning of self-journey.
I don’t have any problem about Glennon’s life choices and thoughts because I always show respect people’s decisions about their own lives even though I don't like those decisions. But sometimes putting someone’s needs before your own doesn’t mean you’re sacrificing yourself or you’re martyr of your damned path you chose for yourself. It means GIVING and SHARING. There is thin line between respecting yourself by choosing your own needs and being shellfish by always putting your own needs before someone else’s. In this book: I didn’t like the way of Glennon’s treatment to her loved ones and I found her tone harsh, self-righteous and close to be narcissist. When I’m reading the pages I feel like Taylor Swift’s “Me! Me! Me!” was playing over and over in my head.
At some parts way of telling her evolving life story was irritating. I just visualized her as a religious leader who thinks her devoted fans, worshippers may start to scream “Amen” for each word comes out her mouth because she just drew a portrait of herself similar to this vision At that part 80’s Madonna’s popular song started playing in my head with my alternated version; “ Glennon, don’t preach, I’m in trouble deep, Glennon, don’t preach I’ve been losing sleep.”
I am so happy her journey resulted well for her and she finally found her true happiness but her ways to earn that freedom in expanse to hurt the loved ones around her and the way of justifying her actions like “Her way or high way” kind of know-it-all communication style didn’t work well for me. Sorry that’s not the inspirational story I’ve been looking for maybe that’s about my character and the way of looking to the matters are quite opposite. I can accept the opposite opinions but that doesn’t mean they’re the right ones. There are so many different approaches and so many different angles of the reality.
I know Glennon doesn’t give any shit my opinion and anyone disagrees her meaningful, full of wisdom thoughts of hers. But I still write, express and tell how I feel. Sorry, it seems like I’m not the right reader for this journey!
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Firstly: I felt like I turned myself into a Foucault Pendulum because my feelings kept swinging between love and hate. I didn’t have so many negative and positive reactions to a book at the same time. But unfortunately negativity defeated the power of positive thoughts.
The beginning of the book was so promising: Glennon is strong woman: recovered alcoholic, bulimic, humanitarian, activist, wife and mother of three falls in love. At the first time in her life she knows the other person is the one: somebody truly stole her heart and finding your soulmate is just a start for her self-discovery and the beginning of self-journey.
I don’t have any problem about Glennon’s life choices and thoughts because I always show respect people’s decisions about their own lives even though I don't like those decisions. But sometimes putting someone’s needs before your own doesn’t mean you’re sacrificing yourself or you’re martyr of your damned path you chose for yourself. It means GIVING and SHARING. There is thin line between respecting yourself by choosing your own needs and being shellfish by always putting your own needs before someone else’s. In this book: I didn’t like the way of Glennon’s treatment to her loved ones and I found her tone harsh, self-righteous and close to be narcissist. When I’m reading the pages I feel like Taylor Swift’s “Me! Me! Me!” was playing over and over in my head.
At some parts way of telling her evolving life story was irritating. I just visualized her as a religious leader who thinks her devoted fans, worshippers may start to scream “Amen” for each word comes out her mouth because she just drew a portrait of herself similar to this vision At that part 80’s Madonna’s popular song started playing in my head with my alternated version; “ Glennon, don’t preach, I’m in trouble deep, Glennon, don’t preach I’ve been losing sleep.”
I am so happy her journey resulted well for her and she finally found her true happiness but her ways to earn that freedom in expanse to hurt the loved ones around her and the way of justifying her actions like “Her way or high way” kind of know-it-all communication style didn’t work well for me. Sorry that’s not the inspirational story I’ve been looking for maybe that’s about my character and the way of looking to the matters are quite opposite. I can accept the opposite opinions but that doesn’t mean they’re the right ones. There are so many different approaches and so many different angles of the reality.
I know Glennon doesn’t give any shit my opinion and anyone disagrees her meaningful, full of wisdom thoughts of hers. But I still write, express and tell how I feel. Sorry, it seems like I’m not the right reader for this journey!
blog
December 4, 2020
I guess I was expecting this to be more of a memoir rather than a lecture
March 28, 2020
DNF
I got about 2 hours into the audiobook (18%) and had to stop.
She had me at first, with the cheetah story and being locked in cages created by those around us. How important it is to find our wild again, and let it be what dictates our choices.
But then she got into going into herself to find God, or the thing she no longer refers to as God, and letting that be what guides her decisions and she started to lose me.
I also lost count of how many times she said she was a bestselling author.
It also bothered me that she essentially told us that she wrote her last book dishonestly, in order to fulfill a narrative she had in her head, a vision of how she saw her life going. Makes me wonder how much to trust this one.
I got about 2 hours into the audiobook (18%) and had to stop.
She had me at first, with the cheetah story and being locked in cages created by those around us. How important it is to find our wild again, and let it be what dictates our choices.
But then she got into going into herself to find God, or the thing she no longer refers to as God, and letting that be what guides her decisions and she started to lose me.
I also lost count of how many times she said she was a bestselling author.
It also bothered me that she essentially told us that she wrote her last book dishonestly, in order to fulfill a narrative she had in her head, a vision of how she saw her life going. Makes me wonder how much to trust this one.
May 12, 2020
Love Warrior is one of my all-time favorite memoirs. I’ve never read an author be so honest about their flaws, so completely vulnerable and exposed to the world. With everything out on the table, she delivers stories that are truly gut-wrenching, inspiring, and ultimately uplifting. I recommend it to 100% of my writer friends who are working on memoirs. It’s that good.
Untamed is the follow-up to that book, and a lot has happened since then. Notably, Glennon has divorced her husband and married a woman. It’s immediately clear that she’s also coming into this book from a much stronger, healthier state of mind. For the most part, Love Warrior is about what it took to rise out of rock bottom. Untamed is about what it’s like to have learned.
A majority of the book--I’d say 60%--are the philosophies of Doyle as a woke feminist. She does a lot of before and after, such as this is what I used to think and this is what I think now. There are still revealing passages of vulnerability, which I find her greatest talent, but she also writes wonderfully from a position of strength. Her metaphor of a caged cheetah is an excellent opening that sets the tone for the book and her philosophies.
As for criticisms, I will say that most of the book is probably preaching to the choir. As a feminist I didn’t really need another rant on the depiction of women in magazines. I agree with everything she says, but there’s a brief stretch where it feels unnecessary to beat that dead horse.
Unlike the gritty truth of Love Warrior, I feel some of the anecdotes in here get cheesy. When describing her parenting strategies, for example, every line of dialogue comes out ‘Leave it to Beaver’ perfect, with her teenage children leaping to disown their cell phones, pick up extra chores, and talk about their deepest feelings in a car full of peers. I don’t doubt she’s a wonderful mother and I’m sure her children are angels, but please. I don’t even have kids and I rolled my eyes.
All in all, I think the book succeeds as a call to action, a form of group therapy, and poignant self-reflection. Women--and men--have bottled these feelings and been “caged” by them for centuries. It’s hard to read Doyle and not feel freed.
Untamed is the follow-up to that book, and a lot has happened since then. Notably, Glennon has divorced her husband and married a woman. It’s immediately clear that she’s also coming into this book from a much stronger, healthier state of mind. For the most part, Love Warrior is about what it took to rise out of rock bottom. Untamed is about what it’s like to have learned.
A majority of the book--I’d say 60%--are the philosophies of Doyle as a woke feminist. She does a lot of before and after, such as this is what I used to think and this is what I think now. There are still revealing passages of vulnerability, which I find her greatest talent, but she also writes wonderfully from a position of strength. Her metaphor of a caged cheetah is an excellent opening that sets the tone for the book and her philosophies.
As for criticisms, I will say that most of the book is probably preaching to the choir. As a feminist I didn’t really need another rant on the depiction of women in magazines. I agree with everything she says, but there’s a brief stretch where it feels unnecessary to beat that dead horse.
Unlike the gritty truth of Love Warrior, I feel some of the anecdotes in here get cheesy. When describing her parenting strategies, for example, every line of dialogue comes out ‘Leave it to Beaver’ perfect, with her teenage children leaping to disown their cell phones, pick up extra chores, and talk about their deepest feelings in a car full of peers. I don’t doubt she’s a wonderful mother and I’m sure her children are angels, but please. I don’t even have kids and I rolled my eyes.
All in all, I think the book succeeds as a call to action, a form of group therapy, and poignant self-reflection. Women--and men--have bottled these feelings and been “caged” by them for centuries. It’s hard to read Doyle and not feel freed.
February 1, 2020
Since I am African/MexicanAmerican, I have a hard time reading memoirs sometimes especially when it is from the White Woman perspective, however I really enjoyed the story Glennon Doyle wrote. Doyle is able to write about finding and being true to yourself but is able to drop gems of information even though she comes from a place of privilege- which she acknowledges herself. I want to give this book to every person I know to read with the hopes that they take away from it what I did which is letting down your guard, being who you want to be, and having compassion for the world.
January 16, 2022
I think this book is more self-help than it is memoir, and the memoir parts were way more interesting.
First off: I have a real problem with the author describing herself as “caged.” I think middle-class, college educated white women really overestimate and catastrophise the kind of disadvantages they face from being women. We are all certainly confined by cultural and social values that are arbitrary. I would not call being in an unhappy marriage “caged.” There are actual people in cages in America, they’re called prisons and detention centres. Some people can’t afford to feed themselves and their families. Some people are worried about getting shot by the authorities, or when they go to school. Some people have had their land stolen off them, and she’s living on it in her nice waterfront house she mentions. Just some perspective, middle class white women, would be GREAT.
The jargon. Omg the the metaphors and the jargon. It was all too twee and relentless. This woman sounds insufferable. She’s constantly proselytising to her friends these amazing sermons where she uses all these metaphors, and quite frankly, I do not buy that this author is that well spoken and articulate and enlightening at all times. NO ONE IS. It’s very “and then everyone clapped” tumblr story for me.
The peak sanctimoniousness of this book had to be where she mentioned that all her friends were activists and artists and therefore they just ~cared~ more deeply than us normie philistines. Or more than the people actually effected by the problems she and her friends are so nobly trying to solve. Also, it’s a weird policy to only be friends with people with mental illnesses. I didn’t find that funny, just a really reductive assessment of mental illness as something that makes someone inherently more interesting.
I don’t want to sound really curmudgeon-y about this book, because I certainly did take some valuable insights from it, but I was largely rolling my eyes at the incessant metaphors and anecdotes where the author always says perfect things to people that encapsulated both their problems and solution. Permission slips. Your knowing. You could actually play a drinking game for every time she mentions that she wants to make a true, beautiful life. Good luck to anyone uncynical enough to find this shit helpful and revelatory, that means you’re definitely the kind of person that does hot yoga and has some “nevertheless she persisted” merch and i feel entirely comfortable judging those kinds of people *shrug emoji*
First off: I have a real problem with the author describing herself as “caged.” I think middle-class, college educated white women really overestimate and catastrophise the kind of disadvantages they face from being women. We are all certainly confined by cultural and social values that are arbitrary. I would not call being in an unhappy marriage “caged.” There are actual people in cages in America, they’re called prisons and detention centres. Some people can’t afford to feed themselves and their families. Some people are worried about getting shot by the authorities, or when they go to school. Some people have had their land stolen off them, and she’s living on it in her nice waterfront house she mentions. Just some perspective, middle class white women, would be GREAT.
The jargon. Omg the the metaphors and the jargon. It was all too twee and relentless. This woman sounds insufferable. She’s constantly proselytising to her friends these amazing sermons where she uses all these metaphors, and quite frankly, I do not buy that this author is that well spoken and articulate and enlightening at all times. NO ONE IS. It’s very “and then everyone clapped” tumblr story for me.
The peak sanctimoniousness of this book had to be where she mentioned that all her friends were activists and artists and therefore they just ~cared~ more deeply than us normie philistines. Or more than the people actually effected by the problems she and her friends are so nobly trying to solve. Also, it’s a weird policy to only be friends with people with mental illnesses. I didn’t find that funny, just a really reductive assessment of mental illness as something that makes someone inherently more interesting.
I don’t want to sound really curmudgeon-y about this book, because I certainly did take some valuable insights from it, but I was largely rolling my eyes at the incessant metaphors and anecdotes where the author always says perfect things to people that encapsulated both their problems and solution. Permission slips. Your knowing. You could actually play a drinking game for every time she mentions that she wants to make a true, beautiful life. Good luck to anyone uncynical enough to find this shit helpful and revelatory, that means you’re definitely the kind of person that does hot yoga and has some “nevertheless she persisted” merch and i feel entirely comfortable judging those kinds of people *shrug emoji*
March 26, 2020
Only rounded up for Abby. Otherwise, this is too Rachel Hollis-y for me. Not sure where the hype for this book came from but... pretty cover!
October 16, 2019
This is a sacred day to me. The most important thing I’ve ever written–my new book UNTAMED–is available for the first time TODAY.
I’m often asked why I don’t publish books more often. My answer is this: I never write a new book until I’ve become a new woman. Over the past few years, I became a new woman. UNTAMED tells that story.
At an event for LOVE WARRIOR, a woman walked into the room and the moment I saw her, three words filled my entire being: There She Is. I knew, from my roots, that she was my person. To honor that knowing–to honor myself–I dismantled and rebuilt my entire life. Loving Abby and creating a life with her was the first decision I ever made not as a good girl, but as a free woman.
UNTAMED is my deeply personal story of discovering, fighting for, and claiming the great love of my life. But this book is not about finding your Abby. It is about finding yourself.
UNTAMED is about how we got caged by the world’s expectations of us, and how we break free. It is about how to reclaim yourself, love yourself, trust yourself and abandon others’ expectations so you can stop abandoning yourself.
It’s the story of how I learned, through my relationship with Tish, that a responsible mother is not one who slowly dies for her children, but one who shows her children how to bravely live. It’s about how I stopped being a martyr and started being a model.
It’s the story of how I learned–through my divorce and blending my family–that a “broken family” is one in which any member has to break herself to fit in. And a whole family is one in which each member has the freedom to bring her entire self to the family table: to remain whole and still belong.
It’s the story of how I learned to set boundaries, make peace with my body, channel my anxiety, and honor my anger. It’s about how I finally discovered the big deal about sex.
It’s about how–when we stop pleasing and start living–we become women who can finally look at ourselves dead in the eyes and say: There She Is.
Today I am asking you to pre-order UNTAMED. Even if you usually wait until a book hits the library, or buy it the week it’s out, please consider ordering today.
It matters to me and to other authors that you vote for our art by buying it as soon as you can. It signals that there are people who believe in our work, which allows us to keep making it. The UNTAMED team is a handful of fierce, dedicated women. We have been working for two years in preparation for today. Your pre-order today means more than I can tell you.
Here’s another reason to order today. We are doing a special signed print run of UNTAMED that includes a beautiful page with the cover art and the vital question: What Would You Do If You Trusted Yourself?
I am going to sign every copy of this limited printing. Think of your people who are going through the thick – in other words, all of your people – and consider gifting them, and yourself, a special signed copy of UNTAMED. Once this first printing is gone, there won’t be any more. We don’t know if the quantity will last two hours or two weeks, so please order for yourself and your people today. Signed copies are available through independent bookstores, Barnes & Noble and Books-A-Million HERE.
In the coming weeks, as I sign each book in the limited print run, I will be sending my love and a personal blessing to each of you. I don’t know if that woo-woo stuff works but it makes me so happy and thankful that each of these books will go from my couch to yours, my hands to yours, my heart to yours.
When I finished writing, I sent UNTAMED to Liz Gilbert. She read it and wrote to me: “This book will liberate women—emotionally, spiritually, and physically. I believe you were born to write this book.” It’s true. I finally freed myself enough to be able to say what I’ve been desperate to say for my entire life.
My dream is that–since freedom, joy, and peace are contagious–they will leap off each page of UNTAMED and into your hearts until each of us is free to live as the people we were born to be before the world told us who to be.
I LOVE YOU. I LOVE US.
G
I’m often asked why I don’t publish books more often. My answer is this: I never write a new book until I’ve become a new woman. Over the past few years, I became a new woman. UNTAMED tells that story.
At an event for LOVE WARRIOR, a woman walked into the room and the moment I saw her, three words filled my entire being: There She Is. I knew, from my roots, that she was my person. To honor that knowing–to honor myself–I dismantled and rebuilt my entire life. Loving Abby and creating a life with her was the first decision I ever made not as a good girl, but as a free woman.
UNTAMED is my deeply personal story of discovering, fighting for, and claiming the great love of my life. But this book is not about finding your Abby. It is about finding yourself.
UNTAMED is about how we got caged by the world’s expectations of us, and how we break free. It is about how to reclaim yourself, love yourself, trust yourself and abandon others’ expectations so you can stop abandoning yourself.
It’s the story of how I learned, through my relationship with Tish, that a responsible mother is not one who slowly dies for her children, but one who shows her children how to bravely live. It’s about how I stopped being a martyr and started being a model.
It’s the story of how I learned–through my divorce and blending my family–that a “broken family” is one in which any member has to break herself to fit in. And a whole family is one in which each member has the freedom to bring her entire self to the family table: to remain whole and still belong.
It’s the story of how I learned to set boundaries, make peace with my body, channel my anxiety, and honor my anger. It’s about how I finally discovered the big deal about sex.
It’s about how–when we stop pleasing and start living–we become women who can finally look at ourselves dead in the eyes and say: There She Is.
Today I am asking you to pre-order UNTAMED. Even if you usually wait until a book hits the library, or buy it the week it’s out, please consider ordering today.
It matters to me and to other authors that you vote for our art by buying it as soon as you can. It signals that there are people who believe in our work, which allows us to keep making it. The UNTAMED team is a handful of fierce, dedicated women. We have been working for two years in preparation for today. Your pre-order today means more than I can tell you.
Here’s another reason to order today. We are doing a special signed print run of UNTAMED that includes a beautiful page with the cover art and the vital question: What Would You Do If You Trusted Yourself?
I am going to sign every copy of this limited printing. Think of your people who are going through the thick – in other words, all of your people – and consider gifting them, and yourself, a special signed copy of UNTAMED. Once this first printing is gone, there won’t be any more. We don’t know if the quantity will last two hours or two weeks, so please order for yourself and your people today. Signed copies are available through independent bookstores, Barnes & Noble and Books-A-Million HERE.
In the coming weeks, as I sign each book in the limited print run, I will be sending my love and a personal blessing to each of you. I don’t know if that woo-woo stuff works but it makes me so happy and thankful that each of these books will go from my couch to yours, my hands to yours, my heart to yours.
When I finished writing, I sent UNTAMED to Liz Gilbert. She read it and wrote to me: “This book will liberate women—emotionally, spiritually, and physically. I believe you were born to write this book.” It’s true. I finally freed myself enough to be able to say what I’ve been desperate to say for my entire life.
My dream is that–since freedom, joy, and peace are contagious–they will leap off each page of UNTAMED and into your hearts until each of us is free to live as the people we were born to be before the world told us who to be.
I LOVE YOU. I LOVE US.
G
April 17, 2020
It has been a while since I have loathed a book so fully as I did that wash your face book. I suppose it was time to find one that I wasn't just bored by, or indifferent about. I detested every page of this nonsensical, self-indulgent, inauthentic word salad. The bold, beautiful cover is as much of a deception as she admits her last two memoirs were.
February 2, 2023
I was really disappointed by this book, especially after seeing such great reviews everywhere. The overview seemed promising, but I found so much of it repetitive. A lot of the shorter essays, focusing generally on injustices or world observations, ended right as they got interesting. The broad claims about gender inequality or cultural expectations are not new or groundbreaking; I don't mean that they shouldn't be written about (actually I think the exact opposite), but Doyle isn't adding any substance to the discussion. While I respect her life and the journey she took to get where she is today, the writing was not effective in conveying any meaning or weight. I found it really annoying and self righteous. It was a struggle to finish...
March 18, 2020
Abysmal, smug and sanctimonious. I'm confident we'll be reading about her next divorce soon.
April 19, 2020
There aren't enough words for how much I loved this book. It was exactly what I needed during this strange time. It grounded me, brought me back to myself, and made me feel a little calmer. I hope to return to this often (something I'm not very good at doing). It was hard not to underline almost everything, and I used about a million book darts to mark passages I loved and want to remember or read again. If you're a fan of Elizabeth Gilbert, Cheryl Strayed, and Brene Brown, I think this one will resonate with you.
April 7, 2020
The whole thing felt like an overcompensation. For what? I don’t know exactly. It was like during the whole book she was just trying to convince us, and herself, that she got it right this time. Her little revelations weren’t exactly groundbreaking. Trite sayings. This book is way overblown
March 16, 2020
Firstly, the format of the book feels a bit disjointed, as if I was simply reading a bound collection of blog posts rather than a cohesive book. After reading Love Warrior, I was interested in her story of what took place afterwards, how she was able to reconcile her faith and move forward with her life. Readers looking for this will be left wanting and personally, I felt as though instead of reconciling her faith, she has traded it for a brand of moralistic therapeutic deism.
Much like Love Warrior, there are clips and phrases resonate deeply within me in terms of life experience as a wife and a mother, but there are many more parts that make me feel like I am teetering on the edge of a dangerous theology of which the basis is that life is ultimately intended to be lived for oneself; that self-truth is the only thing that matters and that we must sacrifice everything and everyone for whatever we deem to be our truth at any given moment in our lives.
Her work should challenge each of us to examine what we truly believe about this life, our marriages, our faith, our relationships and our parenting. After all, that is what good art is intended to do; however, I worry for the scores of women who will simply accept her truth as their own, and proclaim as their anthem that they will, "do whatever the f*ck they want to do" because that is simply what Glennon says is brave and right and true.
If anything is to be gleaned from Glennon's writings, it is not that we must choose to abide by her truth, but that we each must choose by which truth we are going to abide.
Much like Love Warrior, there are clips and phrases resonate deeply within me in terms of life experience as a wife and a mother, but there are many more parts that make me feel like I am teetering on the edge of a dangerous theology of which the basis is that life is ultimately intended to be lived for oneself; that self-truth is the only thing that matters and that we must sacrifice everything and everyone for whatever we deem to be our truth at any given moment in our lives.
Her work should challenge each of us to examine what we truly believe about this life, our marriages, our faith, our relationships and our parenting. After all, that is what good art is intended to do; however, I worry for the scores of women who will simply accept her truth as their own, and proclaim as their anthem that they will, "do whatever the f*ck they want to do" because that is simply what Glennon says is brave and right and true.
If anything is to be gleaned from Glennon's writings, it is not that we must choose to abide by her truth, but that we each must choose by which truth we are going to abide.
April 18, 2020
Everyone was talking about this book and so I got it. Now all these people need to give the two days back to me that I spent reading this crap.
The tone is so self righteous, like I have figured everything out and you’re weak and you don’t listen to yourself nonsense.
Also, who the hell has conversations like the ones written in this book? And that too for very general everyday things. And when someone asked her to repeat what she had said, she was like oh I can’t say it again but here it is in the book when she couldn’t even repeat it to the person she said it to.
Everything annoyed me in this book.
The tone is so self righteous, like I have figured everything out and you’re weak and you don’t listen to yourself nonsense.
Also, who the hell has conversations like the ones written in this book? And that too for very general everyday things. And when someone asked her to repeat what she had said, she was like oh I can’t say it again but here it is in the book when she couldn’t even repeat it to the person she said it to.
Everything annoyed me in this book.
March 21, 2020
I know authors who write books like this polish up conversations that they recount in order to make them more coherent and meaningful in the rear view mirror. But oh my god. The conversations with the authors kids, ex husband, wife, therapist, friends and family were so incredibly self aggrandizing. Pretty much half this book for me was filed under “oh I’m SURE that’s exactly how it happened” *eye roll*. I’m also definitely not the target audience— none of the narrative about finding myself really resonated. Perhaps better for someone who feels stuck in life. Also I did not like the format of random short stories and vignettes. It made it hard to follow.
January 12, 2021
I had no idea who Glennon Doyal was, prior to reading this book. 🤷🏼♀️ To be honest, I likely wouldn’t have picked this one up, had it not been on Reese Witherspoon’s book picks. 😬 This self-help style book is simply not my jam. While a lot of what she had to say was poignant and smart, it still had the self help preach feel for me.
August 18, 2020
Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow.
This cracked open so many internal and emotional doors! It's both beautiful and cathartic while remaining grounded and graceful fuzed with so much empowerment.
This is by far one of the most inspirational and relatable books I've read in a while (and that is saying a lot).
I'll be returning to this one all the way into my late womanhood.
This cracked open so many internal and emotional doors! It's both beautiful and cathartic while remaining grounded and graceful fuzed with so much empowerment.
This is by far one of the most inspirational and relatable books I've read in a while (and that is saying a lot).
I'll be returning to this one all the way into my late womanhood.
April 21, 2020
I wrote a review when I was 3/4 of the way done with the book, talking about how hollow and untrue it felt. And now, I've finished the book (finished it several days ago), and I can't stop thinking about how much I still don't like it, how the author comes off as self-absorbed and sanctimonious.
I wonder if I would have a different reaction to the book if I'd read it in the world we lived in before this awful pandemic, and I have no way of knowing the answer.
So, all I can do is write my review from this moment in time, and to say that I truly disliked this book. Truly. I had never read anything by her before, but I heard her on a podcast with Brene Brown, and I decided to buy the book.
There is something so self-congratulatory about her tone and so smug that I couldn't feel inspired, no matter how much I wanted to. I also felt that she was presenting her life not so much with authenticity and vulnerability but with "hey, look at me and be like me...and if you can't, you'll never know what the good life is." The message I got from this book is that unless I'm willing to give up everything, I'll never know what life really can be.
Many other reviewers have commented on the dialogue in the book, which is awful. Nobody talks that way, not even characters in an Aaron Sorkin script. No one remembers conversations with that type of recall. And that, combined with the purposefully "wild" structure of the book left me feeling irritated, and it's been a long time since I've been irritated by a book.
I am alarmed that Glennon Doyle is lauded as the voice of feminine empowerment because her book comes across as steeped in privilege and arrogance. You can only be happy, she seems to say, if you're BFF's with Liz (Elizabeth Gilbert, of course, famous writer) and if you sit with Oprah at her kitchen table and if you have thousands and thousands of people who will drop everything to listen to you adoringly, and if you are willing to risk everything...
This is neither a memoir, nor a self-help book, nor a coming-out tale. It is simply the self-congratulatory, curated, filtered writings of someone who knows she's adored and wants us to know she knows.
I wonder if I would have a different reaction to the book if I'd read it in the world we lived in before this awful pandemic, and I have no way of knowing the answer.
So, all I can do is write my review from this moment in time, and to say that I truly disliked this book. Truly. I had never read anything by her before, but I heard her on a podcast with Brene Brown, and I decided to buy the book.
There is something so self-congratulatory about her tone and so smug that I couldn't feel inspired, no matter how much I wanted to. I also felt that she was presenting her life not so much with authenticity and vulnerability but with "hey, look at me and be like me...and if you can't, you'll never know what the good life is." The message I got from this book is that unless I'm willing to give up everything, I'll never know what life really can be.
Many other reviewers have commented on the dialogue in the book, which is awful. Nobody talks that way, not even characters in an Aaron Sorkin script. No one remembers conversations with that type of recall. And that, combined with the purposefully "wild" structure of the book left me feeling irritated, and it's been a long time since I've been irritated by a book.
I am alarmed that Glennon Doyle is lauded as the voice of feminine empowerment because her book comes across as steeped in privilege and arrogance. You can only be happy, she seems to say, if you're BFF's with Liz (Elizabeth Gilbert, of course, famous writer) and if you sit with Oprah at her kitchen table and if you have thousands and thousands of people who will drop everything to listen to you adoringly, and if you are willing to risk everything...
This is neither a memoir, nor a self-help book, nor a coming-out tale. It is simply the self-congratulatory, curated, filtered writings of someone who knows she's adored and wants us to know she knows.
March 17, 2021
Where to start with the mess that is this book? This is long. 😬
First, she is an inconsistent narrator. What editor didn’t tell her that she shoots herself in the foot right at the beginning when she basically admits that what she had previously written in books about her life, wasn’t true? That she’s “not sure if she wrote it and then lived her life to be that, or if it was her actual life,” ya that makes you not trustworthy. In other words, “I could be making up this “truthful” memoir too but you’ll never know.”
Also, (paraphrased) “I’ve been looking for high school “golden sparkle” (or however she termed it) my whole life.” She’s in her 40’s! It’s time for better life goals than popularity.
I don’t know Glennon prior to this book and felt myself thinking, “what the heck? why does anyone give this woman so much clout in anything?”
She writes from a post-truth standpoint. And just makes stuff up until she can justify her actions. She basically says to throw out all morals and live however you want. Well that’s a scary world to live in.
Then, there’s the “Christian” aspect of this. She is a Christian. Or was a Christian and is now just “spiritual” but then also tries to quote God-like, spiritual things as if she understands it all, even she isn’t sure. But let me be clear friends, what she preaches, is not Christianity. There is no Jesus as redeemer, born again, here. In fact she claims she is perfect. Yup. She said that. Yet, points out faults in others that should change (but what if that’s THEIR truth, Glennon?)
She has a very pantheistic world view. She has cherry picked from whatever religions/faiths she wants, leaving her with a shallow faith based on nothing. That isn’t faith. But it likely makes her feel good because she doesn’t have to look at her own brokenness. There is no accountability. It’s destructive. She clearly missed what Christianity is even about when she was in church. I don’t have an issue if someone doesn’t believe the same as me. But I do have an issue when they misrepresent what I believe to the rest of the world. Which she does multiple times in this book.
She pulls stuff from the Bible as if she’s an authority on it. I almost lost it when she used the verse “be still and know” as justification that she can find all truth within her (if she’s just still enough- what?!). Quoting it as a bible verse, she clearly didn’t read the entire verse which says “be still and know that I am God” (not glennon is god- but rather yehweh). I wonder if she actually read the Bible she quotes multiple times.
She preaches such a strong “feminist” view of “every woman for herself. I’m the only one I can count on” as if that’s a utopia world we all want. Personally, I would prefer a world where we all learn to love and care for one another. Women and men working together as equally valuable to that end. I consider myself a feminist, but I’m not anti-male. And I think such thinking does more to harm to everything women are trying to accomplish. We need men on our team and we won’t get there by pushing them away. She added nothing new or of value to the conversation.
Then she talks about race. When she’s invited to a group with black women, the other white woman tasks herself with researching and glennon tasks herself with... talking about HER experience. 🤦🏻♀️
I can’t with this woman.
I put her in the same camp as Rachel Hollis. A whole bunch of self absorbed, uneducated, feel-good drivel. I get so annoyed at mommy bloggers being given any sort of platform as if they have actually gone for schooling in the areas that they write about. She writes as if she’s got a psychology degree (she didn’t. I checked.) but I think it’s mostly just her regurgitating stuff she heard in therapy and then adding fluff trying to be “original” and “wise.” She is neither.
I’m sure she’s a nice person. I think this niceness got her her following, But she is a terrible writer. Friends and followers creating buzz does not a good writer make.
The one “truth” I can agree with her on: “Reject what insults your soul.” That pretty much sums up how I feel about this book. It’s insulting the entire way through. I’m fully rejecting it.
I finished this book only because I wanted to give it a fair review and I knew a ton of friends would be talking about it. But if it wasn’t popular and bound to be talked about, I wouldn’t have finished it. If you haven’t started it, I wouldn’t bother.
First, she is an inconsistent narrator. What editor didn’t tell her that she shoots herself in the foot right at the beginning when she basically admits that what she had previously written in books about her life, wasn’t true? That she’s “not sure if she wrote it and then lived her life to be that, or if it was her actual life,” ya that makes you not trustworthy. In other words, “I could be making up this “truthful” memoir too but you’ll never know.”
Also, (paraphrased) “I’ve been looking for high school “golden sparkle” (or however she termed it) my whole life.” She’s in her 40’s! It’s time for better life goals than popularity.
I don’t know Glennon prior to this book and felt myself thinking, “what the heck? why does anyone give this woman so much clout in anything?”
She writes from a post-truth standpoint. And just makes stuff up until she can justify her actions. She basically says to throw out all morals and live however you want. Well that’s a scary world to live in.
Then, there’s the “Christian” aspect of this. She is a Christian. Or was a Christian and is now just “spiritual” but then also tries to quote God-like, spiritual things as if she understands it all, even she isn’t sure. But let me be clear friends, what she preaches, is not Christianity. There is no Jesus as redeemer, born again, here. In fact she claims she is perfect. Yup. She said that. Yet, points out faults in others that should change (but what if that’s THEIR truth, Glennon?)
She has a very pantheistic world view. She has cherry picked from whatever religions/faiths she wants, leaving her with a shallow faith based on nothing. That isn’t faith. But it likely makes her feel good because she doesn’t have to look at her own brokenness. There is no accountability. It’s destructive. She clearly missed what Christianity is even about when she was in church. I don’t have an issue if someone doesn’t believe the same as me. But I do have an issue when they misrepresent what I believe to the rest of the world. Which she does multiple times in this book.
She pulls stuff from the Bible as if she’s an authority on it. I almost lost it when she used the verse “be still and know” as justification that she can find all truth within her (if she’s just still enough- what?!). Quoting it as a bible verse, she clearly didn’t read the entire verse which says “be still and know that I am God” (not glennon is god- but rather yehweh). I wonder if she actually read the Bible she quotes multiple times.
She preaches such a strong “feminist” view of “every woman for herself. I’m the only one I can count on” as if that’s a utopia world we all want. Personally, I would prefer a world where we all learn to love and care for one another. Women and men working together as equally valuable to that end. I consider myself a feminist, but I’m not anti-male. And I think such thinking does more to harm to everything women are trying to accomplish. We need men on our team and we won’t get there by pushing them away. She added nothing new or of value to the conversation.
Then she talks about race. When she’s invited to a group with black women, the other white woman tasks herself with researching and glennon tasks herself with... talking about HER experience. 🤦🏻♀️
I can’t with this woman.
I put her in the same camp as Rachel Hollis. A whole bunch of self absorbed, uneducated, feel-good drivel. I get so annoyed at mommy bloggers being given any sort of platform as if they have actually gone for schooling in the areas that they write about. She writes as if she’s got a psychology degree (she didn’t. I checked.) but I think it’s mostly just her regurgitating stuff she heard in therapy and then adding fluff trying to be “original” and “wise.” She is neither.
I’m sure she’s a nice person. I think this niceness got her her following, But she is a terrible writer. Friends and followers creating buzz does not a good writer make.
The one “truth” I can agree with her on: “Reject what insults your soul.” That pretty much sums up how I feel about this book. It’s insulting the entire way through. I’m fully rejecting it.
I finished this book only because I wanted to give it a fair review and I knew a ton of friends would be talking about it. But if it wasn’t popular and bound to be talked about, I wouldn’t have finished it. If you haven’t started it, I wouldn’t bother.
May 21, 2020
Like every book Glennon writes, Untamed felt like a conversation between my soul and her soul. It's as if she climbs into my heart space, curls up, puts her hands around my heart and goes "Listen closely. You need to hear this. Also, I love you. You got this." That's what her books always feel like to me. And then at some point, her words start melding with everything I already know to be true so it's like my own inner wise woman is speaking to me as I'm reading and I'm feeling a little stronger and more sure of myself every page I turn.
Untamed was no different. Glennon's words are a soothing balm and a call to power all at once; a step up and a slow down in one breath. And I think that is exactly what we need right now, to both step up and slow down. Untamed is a manifesto for that. It's a manifesto for uncovering ourselves, and boldly proclaiming ourselves to the world, bravely holding our ground regardless of what the broader systems' messages are, and then turning inward to be with ourselves in all our brutal and beautiful wholeness. I have folded over so many pages of this book, eagerly awaiting a moment to return so my soul can sit with Glennon's soul and have a chat once again. And I can walk away a little stronger, my head a little higher; a little more loving, of myself and others; and a little more ready to live untamed.
Untamed was no different. Glennon's words are a soothing balm and a call to power all at once; a step up and a slow down in one breath. And I think that is exactly what we need right now, to both step up and slow down. Untamed is a manifesto for that. It's a manifesto for uncovering ourselves, and boldly proclaiming ourselves to the world, bravely holding our ground regardless of what the broader systems' messages are, and then turning inward to be with ourselves in all our brutal and beautiful wholeness. I have folded over so many pages of this book, eagerly awaiting a moment to return so my soul can sit with Glennon's soul and have a chat once again. And I can walk away a little stronger, my head a little higher; a little more loving, of myself and others; and a little more ready to live untamed.
December 31, 2020
Untamed was my first experience with Glennon Doyle, and on the basis of the title I wasn’t expecting it to feel quite so, uh, tame. I will air my grievances below.
First, Doyle spends a lot of time talking about how limiting conventional gender roles are for women and girls, which is certainly a worthy topic, but all of her arguments have been around for literally decades, and she doesn’t add anything new to the conversation.
Second, while Doyle famously left her husband for a woman (soccer player Abby Wambach), her depiction of that relationship doesn’t feel totally honest to me—there’s a lot of talk about how it was fate and a lot of glossing over of any difficulties. I genuinely wish her well in her new relationship, but you’d think by now she’d know better than to portray the whole thing as some kind of fairy tale.
Third, she comes across as the most lecture-y person imaginable: by her own portrayal, she’s constantly lecturing everyone she knows and always turning every situation around to be about herself. Not only was this tedious to read, but it made me wonder how she has any friends left. The epitome of this comes when she’s at an Episcopal church for a reading and, in the minister’s office, in front of the minister, she starts lecturing Abby about how Abby is not really an atheist.
Which leads me to the fourth thing that bugs me about this book: Doyle refuses to accept that there might be people out there who don’t believe in god. She thinks we all just had bad experiences with church as kids, which turned us off organized religion entirely, and somehow it never occurred to us in all our lives that there might be another way to believe in god, so she’s here to inform us that there is, and that’s what we must do. If you say you like being out in nature, she’ll tell you nature is your god. If you say you like the ocean, she’ll tell you the ocean is your god. If you say you like going to McDonald’s and getting a Happy Meal, she’ll probably tell you the Happy Meal is your god. All the open-mindedness she espouses in this book just doesn’t extend to the secular among us. Given how late to the party she was on gender issues, I’ll look forward to a book 20 or 30 years hence, where she’ll share with all of us her scorching-hot take that atheists can still be good people even if they refuse to call sunsets their god.
I’m aware that a lot of women see Doyle as a source of wisdom, although I’m not sure why—she’s a former mommy blogger whose life has frequently been in tatters, and her current advice is all recycled from things feminists, civil rights activists, and Buddhists have been saying for a long time. But I guess it’s good that she’s trying to be more honest and use her considerable influence in a positive way. For her followers, Untamed may be just the book they need. It’s not, however, the book that I need. In the new year I will happily go back to ignoring Glennon Doyle’s existence, and because I am an atheist, she, I guess, will continue to ignore mine.
First, Doyle spends a lot of time talking about how limiting conventional gender roles are for women and girls, which is certainly a worthy topic, but all of her arguments have been around for literally decades, and she doesn’t add anything new to the conversation.
Second, while Doyle famously left her husband for a woman (soccer player Abby Wambach), her depiction of that relationship doesn’t feel totally honest to me—there’s a lot of talk about how it was fate and a lot of glossing over of any difficulties. I genuinely wish her well in her new relationship, but you’d think by now she’d know better than to portray the whole thing as some kind of fairy tale.
Third, she comes across as the most lecture-y person imaginable: by her own portrayal, she’s constantly lecturing everyone she knows and always turning every situation around to be about herself. Not only was this tedious to read, but it made me wonder how she has any friends left. The epitome of this comes when she’s at an Episcopal church for a reading and, in the minister’s office, in front of the minister, she starts lecturing Abby about how Abby is not really an atheist.
Which leads me to the fourth thing that bugs me about this book: Doyle refuses to accept that there might be people out there who don’t believe in god. She thinks we all just had bad experiences with church as kids, which turned us off organized religion entirely, and somehow it never occurred to us in all our lives that there might be another way to believe in god, so she’s here to inform us that there is, and that’s what we must do. If you say you like being out in nature, she’ll tell you nature is your god. If you say you like the ocean, she’ll tell you the ocean is your god. If you say you like going to McDonald’s and getting a Happy Meal, she’ll probably tell you the Happy Meal is your god. All the open-mindedness she espouses in this book just doesn’t extend to the secular among us. Given how late to the party she was on gender issues, I’ll look forward to a book 20 or 30 years hence, where she’ll share with all of us her scorching-hot take that atheists can still be good people even if they refuse to call sunsets their god.
I’m aware that a lot of women see Doyle as a source of wisdom, although I’m not sure why—she’s a former mommy blogger whose life has frequently been in tatters, and her current advice is all recycled from things feminists, civil rights activists, and Buddhists have been saying for a long time. But I guess it’s good that she’s trying to be more honest and use her considerable influence in a positive way. For her followers, Untamed may be just the book they need. It’s not, however, the book that I need. In the new year I will happily go back to ignoring Glennon Doyle’s existence, and because I am an atheist, she, I guess, will continue to ignore mine.
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